La culture

For those most astute readers, you may recall in a previous entry I mentioned the difference between visiting a foreign country and living there. For those not-so-astute readers, worry not, because I didn't go too in-depth on the subject. But I've been thinking more about it, and that's what I wanted to focus my entry on today.

The first time I came to France, it was everything I had ever imagined, most of which was based on movies, songs, books, photographs. Paris was a gorgeous, romantic city that swept me off my feet like an old Hollywood film and carried me to the brinks of all my fancies. The music, the food, the sights! But like movies, songs, and photographs, that trip was only a sampling, a superficial grazing of the iceberg that is French culture. I might as well capitalize it - it's a monumental subject. FRENCH CULTURE.

BU's Paris Internship Program (or PIP as we [never] affectionately call it) is a cultural immersion program, meaning you don't learn about French culture from reading a book. You learn it by living in it. And by doing so, you learn about the nitty-gritty aspects of Parisian existence, not just what year Gustave Eiffel built his tower [answer: 1889] or how many examples of Haussmann-era architecture you can find in a day [answer: too many to count]. Living in Paris, you learn which boulangerie has the freshest, tastiest baguettes (or, more importantly, pain au chocolat), how to put more minutes on your cellphone, which wine tastes the best and costs the least, and how to become a "regular" at the local bistro. You learn to take the metro without thinking about it, you learn the intimacies of your neighborhood, and, above all, you learn the how and why of French behavior and cultural tradition.

Now, I've been here for a grand total of two weeks and one day, so I'm not saying I know all this yet. I mean, I definitely haven't figured out the whole "putting more minutes on the cellphone" thing. But I think that by recognizing the difference between visiting and existing, I've already overcome an important hurtle. I've learned, or am trying to learn, not to be disappointed when Paris doesn't quite seem like La Vie en Rose all the time. It's not about having a constant thrill in your stomach...sometimes it's about being uncomfortable. It's uncomfortable when someone speaks to me and I don't understand. It's uncomfortable when someone French approaches me with an extremely direct manner and I am taken aback. It's uncomfortable when people look at me like I'm stupid because I have to turn around after reading a métro sign wrong. It's not la vie en rose - but it's real life.

So while I have no minutes left on my phone, I have learned a FEW things about French culture. For tonight I will share one of the most important ones with you:

I cannot, CANNOT comprehend, for the life of me, why people think Parisians are mean. Parisians can be abrupt, straightforward, and entirely unabashed, but they are not any meaner than any other group of city-dwellers. I have met far more blatantly rude people in the U.S. than I have in France. Even at a McDonald's in France (which, I repeat, I have only patronized in order to get cheap coffee in to-go cups!), the workers are kind and polite to customers. I was in a boulangerie the other day getting dinner, and a customer complained to the woman behind the counter because he left the store and his bread had broken or something like that. She told him since he had already left the store, she wouldn't just give him another one. He got mad, and she proceeded to tell him over and over in a very firm tone, "You already left the store. You may not have a free baguette". Immediately after, she turned to the next customer with a polite smile and a genuinely genial, "Et pour vous, madame?" She was not being mean to the man with the baguette problem - she was being resolute and direct. The French do not pussyfoot around.